Lily's Knickers
by allred12
Summary: Lily Luna Potter is determined, but when on of her plans held on the eve of the thirtieth anniversary of the Battle of Hogwarts goes wrong, her whole family witnesses her downfall, and hilarity ensues. Prequel to "Sex in the Burrow"


Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter

a/n: This is a prequel to my other story "Sex in the Burrow" based off of Sex in the City. This explains how little Lily Potter's knickers ended up on the kitchen table of the Burrow. I recommend reading the first before this one, or either way. Ugh, yet another shameless plug. I hope you enjoy and please review.

Lily's Knickers

Lily Luna Potter, at nineteen years of age, still felt like the baby of the family, and she was often treated as such. Grandmum coddled her, her own mother continued to scold her, and her brothers still teased her about anything. But Lily was far from being the youngest in the house, and she decided that this summer she would show her family that she wasn't some innocent, incorruptible girl who could be bossed around no matter what.

It was the day before the annual ceremony held at Hogwarts to commemorate those lost in the Battle. This would be the thirtieth year since that fateful day when Lily's own father saved the whole wizarding community. Mulling over this fact, Lily thought that maybe today wasn't the best time to try and lose your virginity.

Lily had decided on this plan shortly after she arrived at the Burrow late yesterday evening. She was rooming with four of her cousins: Roxanne, Dominque, Rose, and Lucy. It was a tight squeeze, but the girls didn't usually mind, except that night, Lily did. The girls were discussing their sexual escapades, and Lily suddenly realized that she had absolutely nothing to offer for the conversation. That fact made her angry, made her feel like she earned the spot of baby of the family that had been engrained into her being since her birth. So she had decided, in a very businesslike manner that she would lose her virginity the next day to the first suitable bloke she happened upon.

Everything that Lily did, since about she turned thirteen, had a transaction like air to it. After leaving Hogwarts, she had immediately teamed up with her brother to strengthen their business empire. He was charismatic and attractive, and had a good idea that he acted upon. He was the face of the company, the reassuring wizard who could make the masses feel comfortable when the stocks took a dip. Lily was the brains. She was focused, and when a minor crash did happen, it often went unnoticed due to her quick response. She treated the virginity thing with the same idea. It was a problem that had to be fixed, so she would fix it in a timely manner.

It wasn't as if she was completely inexperienced, she just had never gotten around to getting close enough to somebody to offer one of her most intimate gifts. But now, she was an adult and she had to grow up. Emotions would only hold women like her back. She had to see what all the hullaballoo was about so she could turn her back on romance and focus on building a company.

So that was why this evening, Lily Luna Potter was patrolling the muggle streets of St. Catchpole to find a suitable muggle boy to take back to the Burrow and have his way with the Boy Who Lived's daughter without even knowing it. Lily happened upon a man who looked to be about her age, perhaps a year younger. He had blond hair that was cut close to his scalp and big green eyes. He was heavyset and much taller than Lily. She approached the man.

"Hello, I was wondering if you could do me a favor?" she asked politely enough.

Lily smelt the alcohol on the man's breath as he answered her question "anything you want, cheery, I got it", he replied as his sickly breath blew down into her face.

"Will you go home with me?" she asked again as she attempted to blink her eyes and flirt with the man. She could tell she was doing a horrendous job. She probably should have talked to Dominque or Victoire first, but of course they were part Veela so they wouldn't have been any help.

The man's eyes bugged out. Apparently it wasn't very muggle-like to ask a strange man to come home with you. He simply nodded his head and began to follow her to the Burrow. She boldly took his hand and led the drunken man on.

Lily didn't want to know his name. For her, this would be a business transaction, except instead of money, they would be exchanging fluids. The night was beautiful, and Lily prayed that none of her family would fancy a late night stroll. She hoped that the house would be deserted when she arrived, all its inhabitants in a deep sleep, emotionally preparing for the next day.

"Ok, we are here", she said to man. She opened the door and led him inside. The man was allowing her to take the lead, something which she greatly appreciated.

"Don't you want to know me name first" he asked as she began busying herself by manually clearing the table as silently as she could.

"No, I want to keep this simple, easy; both of us walking away friends", she said. As soon as the words left her mouth, she realized she had said the wrong thing.

"I usually know my friend's names", he pointed out.

"Ok, just go on my word them. I'm a special type of friend", she mumbled.

That seemed to satisfy him, or at least placate him. Of course, on the other hand, the fact that Lily was unbuttoning her shirt and dropping her trousers could also have had something to do with that.

"Um, are you sure—not that I mind a strange, beautiful girl picking me up off the streets and taking me home with her—but isn't all this a little strange?" the man asked as he appreciably looked at Lily's fit figure.

"No, not in my world. I do this all the time", Lily lied well.

"Oh—ok", the man said. He began to unbutton his own trousers. She approached him and began to kiss him, tackling something that she knew she was good at before diving into uncharted waters.

Their tongues began to battle in Lily's mouth. She could taste scotch on his gums and teeth. It was fresh and strong and musty. It reminded her of the time that Fred had dared her to drink it and then she had promptly thrown up.

The man, while continuing to kiss Lily, let his fingers trail and eventually hooked them in her lacy salmon colored knickers. He used his large thumbs to pull the offending garment down over his legs. She responded by helping him to step out of his trousers. He put his hands under her backside and supportively lifted her up onto the large kitchen table that dominated the Burrow's kitchen. She laid back on the table that she had had so many family dinners upon, but considered this fact for only a millisecond. The man climbed on top of her, and began to slide her up the table, so that their both pairs of their feet would be on the table. Suddenly, Lily felt a sharp stab in her arse.

"OW, what in Merlin's name was that", she whispered as loudly as she could.

"Merlin? Who's Merlin?" the man asked.

"You got a splinter in my arse" she hissed at the man.

"Oh, gosh really, I'm sorry. But isn't furniture supposed to be sanded down?"

"This is an extremely old table. I'm not going to be able to get this out, I can't aim my want back there without accidentally blowing my buttocks off", Lily fumed.

"You're what?" the man asked as he eyes grew larger.

"Get out, go back to the pub", she ordered without looking at him but trying to look at her own naked bum to see the splinter. She couldn't find it, and she was becoming worried. To her utmost fear, she finally accepted that she would have to ask someone to help her get the splinter out. She didn't trust her own magic to try to heal her own bum. Healing charms were tricky and could very easily go wrong.

The man stared at her for a few seconds, then gathered his trousers and left the Burrow. As Lily watched him leave, she realized that the sun was beginning to rise. She had completely lost track of time.

The kitchen was a complete mess, as well as the girl in the kitchen. She quickly found her want in her pants pocket and use _Wingardium Leviosa_ to put all the papers and other rubbish back on the table. Then she found her own clothes and put them back on. She was looking around the room making sure everything was just so when two catastrophic things happened: her parents came down the stairs and she realized that she had lost her salmon knickers.

"Mum, dad; good morning", she managed to squeak as her parents walked into the kitchen.

"What are you doing up so early, Lily", her mum asked. Lily looked around the room frantically.

"Um—I wanted some coffee", she lied.

"Oh, well this is perfect. Ron and Hermione are coming downstairs after us, we thought we would take an early morning walk and watch the sunset, why don't you join us, sweetie?" her dad asked. As Lily looked at her mother, always the more observant parent when it came to wrongdoing, Lily realized that if she didn't say yes, then she would be in real trouble. Even at nineteen, Lily's parents still managed to make her feel like a child, but what Lily felt the most at the moment was the offending piece of wood sinking in deeper to her right buttock with ever movement. What would a morning long walk do?

"Um, sure. I'd love to join you. Perhaps you can even tell me the Battle Story again, it seems fitting doesn't it?" Lily said, trying to draw attention away from herself. Her father looked apprehensive and her mother was scrutinizing her appearance, but as Lily's Aunt Hermione and Uncle Ron came downstairs, all further questioning was abandoned.

After a great yawn from Ron, the five people headed out the kitchen door and took the path that Lily's stranger of the night had recently taken to leave.

The sunrise was extremely beautiful. It was a vibrant red with orange streaked throughout. The Burrow was wrapped in color and bathed in light.

"Lily, dear, are you okay, you are walking a bit strange", Hermione asked of the young woman.

Lily was trying to walk in a way so as not to move her bum which was becoming increasing difficult as they walked up a rather steep hill. "Oh, Aunt Hermione, I'm fine, just—um—trying a new way of walking, spicing up my life", Lily lied badly.

"Have the previous eighteen years of walking not worked out so well for you?" Ron asked, trying to make a joke of his niece's strange excuse.

Lily grumbled something unintelligible as the adults all laughed at her. She couldn't focus on them making fun of her, she was too consumed with the splinter and her rough jeans beginning to rub it the wrong way.

"I think this year will be the best ceremony yet", Ginny said as she contemplated the days coming events.

"I agree, the ministry has been working really hard on trying to get some good speakers this year. Teddy is speaking, isn't he?" Hermione asked. Harry nodded yes in response to her.

"I disagree. I heard George talking to Lee the other day, and they sounded like they were planning something. I think since it's the thirtieth, George may finally do something that Fred would actually approve of", Ron added, with a smirk on his face. Ginny and Hermione looked horrified and Harry seemed to be repressing a smile. Lily laughed loudly, which was definitely out of character for her.

"Are you sure you're all right?" Ginny asked giving her daughter a cursory look.

"Peachy perfect, can we go home now? I'm hungry.

"Yeah, me too, and I'm sure mum has made a huge breakfast by now", Ron added.

"Oh, all right", Hermione said and the group turned around. Lily discovered that descending the hill was even more painful on her fully imbedded splinter now.

"I always knew Aunt Hermione was kinky like that", Lucy's voice range through the kitchen door of the burrow. Several of the other adults were outside on the terrace watching the lovely spring day unfold in front of them. As they saw Hermione, Harry, Ginny, Ron, and Lily make their way to the burrow the said greetings and all the adults walked towards the kitchen door but halted at Lucy's declaration.

"I'm what?" Hermione demanded. Her face turned a fantastic shade of pink as several other adults roared in laughter, Dominque and Roxanne joined in like the whole scene was some amazing joke.

"N-nothing", Lucy stuttered, and then she began to giggle into her hand cutely.

Lily suffered a momentary lapse of panic. All the papers on the table had been moved and she was highly suspicious that her knickers had been somewhere in the pile of rubbish. She had wanted to get home early so that she could find them and hide them before anyone else found them.

"Where were you guys?" Dominque asked. Percy told the girls that most of the family had been just outside, and then Ron told them that he had gone on a walk with Hermione, Harry, Ginny, and Lily.

"Why is Lily with you?" Roxanne asked. Lily thought this was a good question herself.

"She wanted to come", her mother lied.

"I did not want to come", Lily mumbled to herself. But Ginny heard her and turned to her daughter.

"Then do you want to tell me what you were doing in the kitchen so early?" Ginny asked. Finally, Lily realized that her mother had forced her on the walk for a reason, she was trying to get information out of Lily, but two red heads fighting back, it was shaping up to be a long day.

Hermione began to question her own daughter, having recovered from her previous embarrassment. Molly Weasley began to make apparently what was another breakfast, and Lily was fully convinced that her mother was distracted enough that she might be able to go upstairs and see if James could perhaps help her remove the splinter. But, as usual, everything did not seem to be going her way.

Lily realized a second too late that Dominique's face was breaking out into an evil grin, the kind that she wore when she was sure that she had dirt on someone. "Um, whose would these be?" she asked innocently as she held Lily's salmon knickers in front of nearly all her family. Uncomfortable whispers went around the room, and Lily prayed that someone might blame it on one of the sleeping boys upstairs. Lily looked over at her mother to see what she was thinking. Staring back at her were furious brown eyes and Lily realized that her ever-knowing mother knew exactly what Lily had been doing last night. Knowing that she wouldn't be able to hide any longer, Lily stepped forward and snatched the knickers from her cousin. She stomped from the room and yelled at her mother as she left "I woke up so early so I could hide these. I am never going on a family walk again when I just woke up so I could hide the evidence. JAMES! James! Wake up, you need to remove a splinter from my arse!" she shouted as she banged on the door of the room that her brothers and cousin was sharing.

Lily heard her mum coming up the stairs in hot pursuit, yelling threats and overused sentiments. James threw open the door just as his mum rounded the corner, Lily slipped inside. Well, what a way to begin the day, she thought to herself as she turned to her brother.


End file.
